Shattered Heart, Shattered Mirror
by SaviourOfTheQueen
Summary: Regina can't help the conflicting feelings she's feeling for a certain fairy. Destiny says she should love a lion tattooed man, but what does Regina think? Will she defy destiny and make her own decision? And what does The Blue Fairy think about this? Spoilers up till 3x03, so if you haven't seen it, be warned. ANGST, ROMANCE! Fairy Queen


Regina faltered while deep in thought, making the quill that was held in her hand begin to drip ink onto the pages of her diary. Unknown to her husband, Regina had actually kept two diaries. She was not stupid enough to acknowledge that Leopold read her diary entries, so she secretly kept two. The diary she was completing now was the one she kept close to her heart, the one she hid away from prying eyes. Passageways and passageways of her true feelings were kept in that diary, and only recently had Regina started to write of another person in there. _Tinkerbell_.

Just the mention of her name was enough to reluctantly remind her of the tragedy that happened earlier that evening. She and Tinkerbell had traveled to a commonly known tavern located further down in the kingdom, hoping to find Regina's second chance at true love. But that was the problem Regina couldn't solve.

The talk of a second chance at love was much of a miracle to Regina's ears, for she had eliminated the idea of being able to love another after Daniel. Then came in Tinkerbell. Even when Tinkerbell had taken her to the tavern and pointed out the man with the lion shaped tattoo, all Regina could do was notice the tingling sensation in her hands as she felt her fingers interlocked with Tinkerbell's.

It had only been a few weeks since she had first met Tinkerbell, and yet Regina had concluded that she had never been as happy as she was with her, than compared to the five years spent as wife to the king. Tinkerbell was her escape, she was a person Regina felt she could trust and feel that she wasn't imprisoned or judged for her actions. With Tinkerbell she felt free.

And that was the reason she was hesitant to finish her diary entry. For when she described her time with Tinkerbell, the strong feeling of euphoria filled her and somehow she had always noticed herself smiling in the mirror when she put her diary away. And that made her cautious. She hadn't felt that way since Daniel, and her relationship with Daniel had become a tragic turn that made her stomach twist at even the mention of his name, even years after his death.

Regina bit the inside of her cheek as she tried to make sense of the evening once again. She had partially followed Tinkerbell's suggestion, to open the door and meet her soul mate, but she found she couldn't. There was something holding her back once she opened the tavern door with her apparent 'soul mate' only yards away. _A strong gut feeling telling her to turn around. _That was the only way Regina had described how she felt the moment she had set eyes on the lion tattooed man. A sense of dread had unsettled her in an instant, as if she knew that what she was going to do wasn't with the right person. It wasn't _Tink_.

"_Regina_," an all too familiar voice was heard from the balcony of her room. Regina flinched; her first instinct was to hide her diary under the covers, for if anyone was to read even a fragment of her true feelings… Regina couldn't even _think_ of the thought of Leopold getting that information. However thankfully, when she looked up with panicked eyes, she soon released a small breath as she saw Tinkerbell, in all her beautiful glory, looking at her with a complexed expression. Though even that didn't help make matters any better.

Tinkerbell had grown to normal human size, the magic still sparkling around her, while she adjusted to the new size. Regina only smiled slightly, the view of Tinkerbell surrounded with the green pixie dust was still a magnificent sight to see, before her smile faltered as she realized what Tinkerbell was going to ask. "What happened?" The blonde had asked desperately, her voice conveyed one of sadness. Regina faltered; wondering if she should tell her the truth. That the real reason she was not currently accompanied with her 'soul mate' was due to her running away, because she knew, deep down, that her only feelings were towards _her_.

Tinkerbell must have sensed her hesitation as she moved forward, moving to sit on Regina's bed, and then gave Regina the most reassuring and kind smile she had ever seen. "I don't understand, you're not glowing with new love!" She exclaimed with joy in her tone, she shuffled closer to Regina and grasped her hand, which didn't escape Regina's attention that she did so without uncertainty, but with familiarity. "_You_ should be glowing." She then brought her legs on the bed, crossing them so as to face Regina. "In fact, you shouldn't even be alone." Her voice lowered, sounding saddened as she took in the empty and silent room. "Why is that?"

Regina would have been untruthful if she said she didn't think about lying to her. Her mother's words haunted her mind, _love is weakness_. She tried to shake the thought off, but then Rumpelstiltskin's words earlier that week also came back to disturb her - _the darkness likes how you taste, dearie._ All those comments and reminders were clouding her thoughts; she shook her head and looked back up to Tinkerbell, who was watching patiently with a concerned expression. "It didn't work, your fairy dust must have been wrong." Regina replied honestly as she stared at the fairy, hoping her expressions didn't give anything away. Tinkerbell frowned, watching her dearest friend closely.

"Fairy dust is never wrong, Regina." Tinkerbell confirmed softly, her voice very assuring as she tried to grab Regina's attention. She then smiled sweetly, "you and the lion tattooed man are destiny, _soul mates_." Her smile was contagious as she desperately tried to uplift Regina's thoughts, only wanting to see the person she cared about smile. Regina shrugged her shoulders comically, as if the words _soul mates_ were nothing, making Tinkerbell laugh earnestly, now identifying as to what she thought was Regina's problem. She moved even closer to Regina, taking the diary from underneath the blanket, and placing it on the dressing table next to them, before grabbing both of her hands. "You _deserve_ happiness Regina!" She assured very enthusiastically, making Regina's stomach flutter.

Nobody had ever wanted pure happiness for her except Daniel and her father, and yet here Tinkerbell was, defying The Blue Fairy in order to help her. The feeling of being loved and cared for right then made the tiny piece of doubt Regina had about running away from her 'soul mate' disappear instantly. She knew she made the right choice. But explaining that to Tinkerbell was different…

"That man wouldn't have been my happiness, nor would I have been his." Regina confessed greatly, because it was true. She could not have been with a man who loved her dearly, while her thoughts were on another constantly. That wouldn't have been fair for either of them. And she at least deserved to give the man a chance to have a lover who will love him back just the same.

She waited for Tinkerbell to respond but nothing came. Regina turned her head upward and saw that Tinkerbell's features had faltered, turning into one of confusion as she tried to understand why Regina couldn't possibly be happy with that man. Her wings fluttered as she brought their linked hands to her lap.

"You were afraid," Tinkerbell concluded as she turned to look at the brunette earnestly, her one eyebrow rose in friendly accusation. Regina would have turned to her with an offended expression, but she knew she wouldn't be fooling either of them if she had, for the truth was that she _was_ afraid. Yet not for the reasons Tinkerbell thought.

"I wasn't afraid of _him_," she responded, making Tinkerbell do the most adorable face of confusion Regina had ever laid eyes on – making Regina so desperately want to ignore this conversation and just kiss her senseless. She sighed, licking her lips before continuing. "I opened the door and was ready to meet him-"

"But then you were afraid, because destiny is such a large concep-"

"I was afraid because I knew _he_ wouldn't make me happy," Regina interrupted her, trying to get her point across. She didn't realize it would be this difficult to just _tell her_. Tinkerbell's eye widened slightly as realization slowly dawned on her, _Regina had eyes for someone else_. She unlocked her hands from Regina and placed them on her shoulders, a huge grin on her face. For if Regina had found an alternative love, one who was able to make her happy, then she was delighted- though her heart slightly faltered at the idea of Regina with someone other than herself, but she couldn't reveal that, not when Regina had found someone of interest.

"Then _who_ would make you happy?" She asked obliviously, wanting to know who this person was just so as she could see Regina smile. Her hands were grasped firmly on Regina's shoulders while she sat before her on her knees. And Regina couldn't take it…

With one smooth movement, Regina lifted herself from against the headboard and softly crushed her lips against Tinkerbell's, certainly answering her question. The blonde's eyes widened slightly and her wings fluttered. The initial shock of Regina's actions surprised her and thrilled her all the same, before her senses calmed and she relaxed, sighing in pleasure at the feeling of Regina's soft lips against her own. The sound of contentment encouraged Regina; her hands cupped the sides of Tinkerbell's face, caressing her cheeks lovingly, all the while her heart beating erratically. Her eyes were closed as she concentrated on the blissful feeling of their connected lips. Regina felt grounded and yet so free at the same time, all the pent up feelings and emotions she had felt the past two weeks finally being able to escape her, turning into this passionate connection that she had been wanting, _needing_, since she first laid eyes on Tinkerbell.

Regina smiled into the kiss when she felt Tinkerbell's hands move around her neck, bringing them even closer, before Tink slightly parted her lips, allowing Regina to brush her tongue against her bottom lip. The feeling was unbelievable. Regina felt elated at the feeling of Tinkerbell's magic surrounding them both. She felt it mix with her own and she gasped, the sensations made Regina feel light headed and desirably aroused as she shuddered at the sensation of her whole body on edge, tingling pleasantly and making her grab around Tinkerbell's waist securely.

Regina opened her eyes when they parted and joined once again, their cheeks connected together delicately. Both of them were too engrossed at the magical feeling of each other to witness the sparkling scenery around them, as the room glistened with both purple and green magic, making the room reflect with a radiant of different shades.

Gone was the thought of Rumpelstiltskin's demeaning words. Regina sensed not even an insignificant bit of darkness while with Tinkerbell, she felt light, her stomach turning as she tingled with excitement. She had never felt this happy in a long time, she felt pure. Tinkerbell tasted of magic itself, an encouraging sensation that drew Regina in completely, making her want to taste it over and over, to be overwhelmed by it.

Eventually, Tinkerbell was the first to part properly. Her chest rose and fell quickly; she was completely breathless from the lack of oxygen, and the beauty that was Regina. Regina herself was in a similar state, her eyes danced with admiration, glistening lightly in the magical glowing room. They both glanced at each other and noticed both of the other's cheeks were red, flustered by their instinctive reactions for another.

Regina watched as Tinkerbell chuckled lightly, connecting her forehead with her own, not wanting to fully apart from her. Regina was overjoyed; the doubt of rejection she had felt before kissing her was wiped away from her memory. She watched Tinkerbell flutter her eyes and mentally cursed herself for not doing this earlier.

"_You_ make me happy," Regina finally confessed with such love and admiration in her voice, making Tinkerbell blush adorably and look down. Regina waited for her response, but after a few moments had passed, the fixed smile on her face slowly wavered when she saw Tinkerbell's shoulders falter and her wings lower. Her stomach dropped as she watched the blond lift herself from the bed, a saddened look of realization crossing her face, before she walked over to the balcony of Regina's bedroom, not having said a word.

The sense of dread that Regina had feared had slowly made its way back into her mind. Her mind started to create a daunting cloud of doubt, had her actions not been wanted? She frowned at that thought; she had seen and _felt_ the pleasure from Tinkerbell just as much as herself. So what was the problem? Her anxiousness and wanting for an explanation caused her to lift from her bed and follow behind Tinkerbell. _I'm not afraid of anything_, she reminded herself.

As she sauntered up beside Tinkerbell her stomach fluttered with nerves as they found themselves looking down from the rusty, broken railing that had made them meet in the first place. She had wanted to walk up to Tinkerbell and desperately ask for answers- wanting to know just _why_ she walked away, because Regina knew that she wanted that kiss just as much as herself- but instead she took the time of silence that had formed between them to ponder about that night, wanting to give Tinkerbell some space. After some thought, Regina realized that she had become so angered and frustrated by Rumpelstiltskin's words that day, that she could have initially died due to her exasperated irritation on a man not worth her time.

"I never thanked you, for saving my life." Regina said out loud, her voice sounded hush in the quietness. She breathed in heavily before turning to look at Tinkerbell; she noticed how conflicted she seemed, like she was confused as what to do. "Thank you," Regina breathed out sincerely. For if Tinkerbell had never saved her, she wouldn't be alive, and more importantly, she wouldn't have met her.

"Regina…" Tinkerbell's voice was quiet, unsure as to how to proceed. She then turned to look at the brunette and Regina watched how her lower lip quivered. "Love is forbidden for fairies." Regina nodded, she had guessed as much. She had taken the last week taking under consideration the faults of her developing feelings for Tinkerbell and realized many problems would have occurred. She was still a married wife, abandoning the kingdom would have been an act of treason, so they would have been hunted all their lives if they were to run away, and finally, it was commonly known that fairies were not allowed to love. But Regina didn't care. Love had been a restriction all her life, she was told who she could and could not love, and even when she had decided, her mother decided against her. After she recalled those thoughts, she grabbed Tinkerbell's hands between her own, interlocking their fingers, giving them both a sense of familiarity.

"I won't tell anybody if you won't," she replied, the tiniest upturn of her lips making Tinkerbell smile in return. And though Regina's comment was meant to help the mood and make Tinkerbell smile at the fact they had actually _kissed_, they both understood the seriousness of their situation if they were to continue. But even with that still in mind, Regina watched Tinkerbell nod only slightly, the awe returning in her eyes before she gave in to Regina's smile and moved her head closer to attach their-

_Poof_. Before their lips were able to meet they were abruptly thrown back to separate sides of the room. Everything had happened so fast and erratically that neither Regina nor Tinkerbell were able to use their magic as a defense, before they were slammed against the room's solid walls harshly. The last thing Regina remembered was seeing Tinkerbell fall to the floor, her body looking limb, before everything went black and she seeped into unconsciousness.

.

Tinkerbell winced, a tear rolling down her face as she pushed herself off the wall. The pain was immense, she turned back to see her wings had been damaged and slightly crushed from the impact. Her eyes soon widened as she thought of Regina, she quickly scanned the room, her heart raced when she saw Regina lying on the floor, her body still and unmoving. Panic rose in Tinkerbell's chest, but before she was able to check on Regina a figure blocked her view. Slowly, she looked up; the pain in her neck restricted her from normal movement, before her stomach dropped.

_The Blue Fairy._

"I am _disgusted_," Blue's tone was harsh; the normal delicacy that Tinkerbell was accustomed to had vanished, replaced with a livid fairy whose cruel features made Tinkerbell's body shiver with fear. Her body appeared darker, much like a silhouette, as the moon's light shone from the balcony. "I had warned you of second chances. You have broken all the rules in the book, but this is beyond repair. You defied me, broke The Fairy Code and continued to help the fallen queen, whose destiny is of pure darkness." Tinkerbell watched as Blue snarled at the mention of Regina, her head shook in displeasure as she slowly walked closer to Tink, a looming shadow started to form over her. "You are an impulsive and reckless fairy, I cautioned you of her mother's wrath. Do you seriously believe she won't become the same?"

Tinkerbell closed her eyes, trying to drown out the horribleness that Blue insisted was the truth. She herself had grown close to Regina over the past few weeks, and she had never _once_ tried to kill her, or even harm her! She had to stop herself from sobbing at the memory; Regina had been in awe of her the entire time, shown her companionship and _love_. She had made Tink feel things that no other fairy had ever experienced, and that's why she continued to help her. Not only did she derive great pleasure from seeing Regina happy, but she simply wanted to be in her presence. Being around Regina was indescribable. She was able to forget everything. Forget how imprisoned she felt of The Blue Fairy, forget the feeling of being alone and the emptiness of seeing everyone around her happy, with all their wishes granted, while she stayed friendless. With Regina she felt free.

"There is no hope for a woman like _her_. Her mother is now the queen of hearts, and her teacher is the dark one, does this not strike you as frightening, Green? The fact you are still alive is evidence enough that she has already begun planning the undoing of you, you silly girl." Blue uttered, her voice flat and hard. Blue turned her attention away from Tinkerbell; she walked with elegance and a conceit posture, with her shoulders held back and her head held high. "There will be consequences for your actions..."

While Blue stood a distance away, glaring at Regina's limp body, Tinkerbell quietly and painfully got up from the floor, and grabbed her wand that she had dropped when she was thrown against the wall. Her hand was shaking when she turned back to see The Blue Fairy standing over Regina with pure hatred, glaring at her like she was nothing, and only capable of darkness. Tink reacted; she _couldn't_ allow Blue to harm Regina. As much as Tink wanted to go check up on Regina's injuries, she needed to get her out of there, away from Blue, somewhere safe and secure. So, with Blue's back turned against her, Tink swished her wand – hoping to attack Blue surprisingly- but she waited too late, _yet again_.

Blue swirled around and caught the magic Tink had tried to attack her with in her hand, the expression on her face livid, before she waved out her arms and pushed Tinkerbell against the wall, only this time pinning her there.

"_How dare you?!_" She looked to Tink with hatred, "I am your leader, and yet you defy me. You are now a lost cause Green." Tinkerbell had grown frustrated, she struggled against Blue's magic that held her against the wall, and then down at Regina. There wasn't any hope.

"I was _helping_ a person-"

"Regina is certainly not a person. And this, _affection_," she spat the word out, the term disgusting her to the bone, "is completely unacceptable."

"No," Tinkerbell retorted urgently, her voice desperate while tears persisted to stain her cheeks. "I told you, Regina just needs help. She's not a lost soul, she's just lonely. She's the exact sort of person myself and other fairies should be helpin-"

"_Enough of this_," Blue then waved her hand and instantly Tinkerbell whimpered out loud before she fell to the ground forcefully…

All that she felt was pain. A burning sensation had overcome Tinkerbell's entire body. She didn't need to turn around to know that her wings had gone. Burned. Just like all her hopes and dreams. For a fairy was no fairy without its wings. And what's more, she couldn't feel her magic. The Blue Fairy had taken away everything from her. Her cries were muffled below the sound of Blue's voice. "You are a fairy no more." Tink heard her declare before Blue brushed past her, not giving her a second look before she walked over to Regina's mirror.

Tinkerbell attempted to swallow her sobs. She watched as Blue waved her hand in front of the mirror, noticing it ripple and the reflection to form into an image of a jungle. Tink's eyes widened in horror once she realized it was in fact a portal, Blue was planning to banish her to another world. Absolute dread kicked in, she couldn't leave_. Not now._

With every single ounce of strength she had left, she crawled toward Regina's body. Her legs gave way half way, her energy drained from the lack of magic and wings. By the time she managed to reach her, tears had completely covered her face. She closed her eyes, and leaned forward, kissing Regina's forehead. It was then she wished for anything, _anyone_, if she could be granted her own wish. _To be able to see Regina once more. _

"Stay strong Regina," she whispered next to her ear, her voice croaked and hoarse, as her tears streamed onto Regina's cheek._ Thank you_, were her last thoughts before she was lifted into the air. The air was taken from her lungs before she was thrown into the mirror, the last thing she saw was the fluttering of Regina's eyes opening…

.

Regina's heart dropped. Her vision was blurred, her body ached and she felt weak, but the sight of Blue pushing Tinkerbell into her own mirror was enough to shatter her heart into oblivion. She had no recollection of what was happening, but she acknowledged she must have blacked out beforehand, and now there she was, watching her love disappear into another world.

"_Tinkerbell!_" She screamed while reaching out her hand, hoping to all the gods that her magic would help her. But nothing happened. She got up, the pain and hurt at the back of her mind, as she ran at the mirror.

The sound of the mirror breaking was like a rip to the heart. She heard as Blue squeezed her hand, magically shattering the mirror and all the hope Regina had of following Tinkerbell. Pieces of glass were thrown across the floor, and the reflection was gone. Regina's throat clogged up, no sound being able to leave her. _Tinkerbell was gone_. Like everybody else she loved. She fell to the floor helplessly.

Blue shook her head at the pathetic sight of the fallen queen.

"This was _supposed_ to be Regina. For a queen such as yourself is destined for darkness," and before Regina was able to retort, hit back, or even _look_ at her- she was gone. Her absence leaving Regina alone to weep at the loss of yet another person she loved. Her heart was a shattered as the broken pieces that lay scattered across her marble floor. She had no idea what to do; there was no spell, no incantation, no _nothing_ to help her find Tinkerbell. Regina wept; she didn't even have a clue as to which land Tink was transported to.

As the tears continued to trickle down her face, she looked around her room, urgently looking for something that might help her, but she secretly knew it was pointless. Apparently even fate had its wicked ways out for her life.

Her head hit the back of the wall she lay on as she physically and mentally didn't have the strength to hold herself up. However, the sight of something shiny grabbed her attention in the corner of her eye, hidden behind tiny pieces of glass. Sniffling back her tears, she bent over and picked up the object, Tinkerbell's wand. Her lips quivered as she noticed the beautiful green glow that used to surround it was absent, Regina tightened her grasp on the object, never wanting to let go.

"_Goodbye Tinkerbell_."

* * *

**Or is it really goodbye? Who knows? I don't know whether or not to make another chapter? It's up to you guys, did you enjoy this enough or...?**  
**Please give me your opinions, I'm British so I tried to make certain words American rather than British, so I deeply apologise if there _are_ typo's. The reason I made Blue so harsh was because (as well as the fact I hate the character and find her shady) I personally do think she's quite a dark character. And plus, we never saw how Tinkerbell got to Neverland, so that was my take on it :')**


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